Renewed Strength - Men

What does your Facebook say about you?

Thu, 14 Mar 2013 13:52:00 -0500

I spent some time today lurking around on Facebook. Viewing the pages of some of my Christian friends and some of you who have “Liked” this page. It was quite surprising! Statuses about prayer and their walk with God, mixed in with statuses about drug use and promiscuity. Liked pages about religion along with Liked pages showcasing half dressed women. What are you telling the world about yourself and what it means to call yourself a Christian?

Sadly, the actions of some Christians has given the world a bad view of a Christian is. Think of the man who goes to Church, then comes home and goes back to beating his wife and getting drunk. What does this teach his family about being a Christian man? What about the car with the Ichthys (The Christian Fish) on the back of their car that curses at you or gives you the finger if you don’t let them pull in front of you? Without a doubt we can agree that these actions can very quickly send mixed signals about us being ‘followers of Christ’.

How can we tell others about the importance of following Christ if we are still pursuing our sinful desires and flaunting them online? There is a lot of truth to the saying “actions speak louder then words”. No matter how many religious pages you share, it is quickly negated when their displayed next to eye candy! During the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus told us “If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of the parts of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of the parts of your body than for your whole body to go into hell!” Matthew 5:29-30

Is it a coincidence that the two body parts He mentioned are the eye and the hand. Think about that for a few minutes guys……

I’d like to challenge everyone to really evaluate how they are letting God’s love show through their life. Take the time to go through your social media accounts. Look at the items on your desk at work, the jokes you tell or even laugh at. Are you telling others that you are a Christian or are you showing them?

Are You Fulfilling Your Biblical Role?

Mon, 11 Feb 2013 16:57:00 -0500

Recently our Church hosted an all day event called Men Stepping up. The topic and reason for the event was simple, for us men to learn how to step up and be the real men God calls us to be. Some men think being a man to God's standard is easy. Do manly things like watch sports, and hunt, then go to Church every week (or so). Some guys think being a man means bringing home a good paycheck and make sure your family does what you say. If you look at the qualities Jesus had, there not quality’s that our society would consider manly at all. Scripture tells us that Jesus was humble & gentle (Matthew 11:29). He was compassionate (Matthew 9:36, 15:32). He was dependent on His Father (Matthew 24:42). Jesus Cried (John 11:35, Isaiah 53:3). He was a servant (John 13, Phil. 2:7), hugged children (Matthew 19:13-15), loved His mother (John 19:26-27), and needed the fellowship of others (Mark 14:32-33). For some reason, we have developed our own ideas of what makes someone a man.

Vodie Bauchan explained that our society measures manhood by the 3 B's; the billfold, ball field, & bedroom. Our culture says that if you have mastered those 3, you are a real man. The problem is that by continuing down the path that society encourages, we are headed to destruction! Reportedly more than 90% of American men believe in God and 5 out of 6 call themselves Christians. If that was where the statistics ended, that would be great news. The problem is the statistic goes on to say that only 1 out of 6 attend church on a given Sunday. The average man accepts the reality of Jesus Christ but fails to see the value in going to church.

That is horrifying! Ephesians 5:25 tells us “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her.” The Greek word translated as “love” means a love that continues. Not just liking them a lot or a sexual passion, but a deliberate attitude and action that is consumed with the others well being. Hence why it says “as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself for her”. As men, how can we say that we love our wives and families if we are not leading them and setting the example of how to walk with Christ? It doesn't matter how much money you bring home or what you're able to provide for them, if you're not providing them with a Christian household that is actively seeking to grown closer to God.

As men, not only have we dropped the ball, we have freely handed it over to our wives and let them run the family. US men have been imitating Adam ever since the fall. Adam was passive. When eve was tempted by the serpent, Adam should have stepped up and lead eve back to trust in God's direction and away from the devil.

Now most of us are blessed with wonderful wives that can do a great job of running the house. By no means am I trying to discredit or belittle women. I have heard women say they are just as capable of even better at running the household. Some even say that they are stronger than their husband's and don't need a man over them. Well I'm not saying that women have to submit to their husband's. I'm not saying that men have to love, care for, and spiritually lead your families at all costs. God does! By not fulfilling our biblical role, we are ignoring God’s perfect plan and that can only lead to destruction.

With 5 out of 6 of American “Christians” not attending Church on Sunday’s, it’s easy for those of us who do attend Church on Sunday’s to say and think they are doing better than most. Well this is true, but there is more to it than just attending Church on Sunday’s. A Christian is a follower of Christ. Someone who is constantly seeking Him more than once a week.

Robert Lewis, the founder of Men’s Fraternity explained a 4 point definition of true manhood. A Man rejects passivity, accepts responsibility, leads courageously, and expects a greater reward. As men, we are not rejecting passivity. Society has been telling us, and we have come to accept that women can run the household just as well as we can. Rather than rejecting society's message and relying on God’s perfect plan for families, we have embraced passivity stepped down from our role, and left a void in our families. A man doesn't take the easy road; a man doesn’t let his wife lead the family so he can watch the game. A man doesn't let his family miss Church because they are tired from a busy week. A man accepts his responsibility to lead his family courageously, because he knows that his reward is not on this earth, but in heaven.

For many people, the emergency responders on 9/11 became the example of real men being courageous. They put their fear aside and did what was right. Being courageous has nothing to do with not being afraid. It’s putting your fear aside and doing what's right, regardless of the cost. Courageous men trust God! In the story of David and Goliath, David put his fear aside and went to fight the giant. This wasn't because he had some ingrained lack of fear. He didn't think he was bigger or stronger than Goliath. He went toe to toe with the giant because he trusted in God. See, God isn’t just calling people with extraordinary talents or skills. He is calling all of us to trust in Him, put Him first, and do His work.

We all know that we are not alone in our quest to serve Him and serve other. We know that the Lord is there to lead us and that He will never leave us or forsake us. We are also called to help each other grow closer to Christ. By being in a mentoring relationship with others, we can truly strengthen each other. In 2 Timothy 2:2, The Apostle Paul writes “And what you have heard from me in the presence of many witnesses, commit to faithful men who will be able to teach others also.” The duty to preach the Gospel does not just fall on the Pastor. It is up to all of us. We should be committed to strengthening each other.

Proverbs 27:17 says “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.” Just like a metal file sharpens a ax, or sharpening steel sharpens a knife. When two friends come together to help each other grown, one sharpens the other.

Most men will say they either don’t know how and/or don’t feel qualified to mentor someone else. Knowing how is easier than it sounds. Mentoring someone else doesn't have to be formal. You don’t have to follow a lesson plan. Whenever I think about men mentoring other men, I always think about the scene in the movie Courageous. When the 4 Police Officers and friends are sitting in Adam’s backyard, discussing what they are going through & encouraging each other to grow in Christ. Mentoring someone else is just that simple.

Many people also feel they are not qualified to mentor someone else. The qualifications are actually quite simple. You need to be willing to mentor someone, be willing to listen to them, willingness to provide Biblical truths, and able to trust in God. In other words, you just have to be willing to help others, and trust in God for the result.

This week I had the opportunity to talk with a man who had been drinking heavily as a way to deal with the stress and sadness over his son being in jail. He knew that turning to alcohol was wrong but said that was the only thing that helped him feel better about what was going on. He went on to say that he wanted to talk to his pastor about his problem but he was too embarrassed to admit his problems to a preacher. I tried to explain to him that none of us are perfect, we are all sinners and without even knowing his preacher, I'm sure he has had areas of his life that he was not proud of either. If you're still facing challenges in your life, give your burdens up to Christ and find someone to help and mentor you. If you have a checked part that you have overcome, someone else can benefit from your testimony & mentoring.

I read analogy this week. There are 2 kinds of theology. Cat theology and dog theology. Let's say two pets have an amazing, kind, generous owner. The cat thinks: "I must be an amazing and valuable cat." The dog thinks: "I have an amazing and valuable master." The blessings I have are not because I am a amazing and valuable person, it’s because I serve a amazing and valuable Master.

Folks were not perfect. I'm sure we all have times in our life we would love to do-over. We can't change the past but you can change the path you on and make a difference in the future. God has already promised up that when we repent from our sins and follow him, he will cast our sins as far away as the east is from the west. So don't let regret stop you. Make a commitment today to step up and answer gods call. Make a commitment today to lead your family.

Serve others

Sat, 20 Oct 2012 10:54:00 -0500

After a busy night and not getting to bed as early as I had hoped, I had planned to sleep in as late as possible. At 6am I was woken up by a friend of mine who needed me to jump start is car due to a dead battery. My first thought was “NO! I want to sleep!” Luckily I was able to hold my tongue and not say this out loud. I quickly got out of my comfortable warm bed, got dressed, and went outside to help get his car started. I couldn’t help but be reminded about the day before when the same friend made the comment that he didn’t know I was a “Church person”. Now this friend of mine who is not a Christian, but now knows that I am, woke me up to help him out. I have no problem helping someone out, believer or not, my only problem was that I was no longer in my warm bed!

The thought of my initial mental reaction bothered me. If I would have said my thoughts out loud and not been willing to help him out (or even not being happy about it), would this allow God’s love to show through me? Absolutely not! Christ calls us to serve others, more than ourselves! Philippians 2:3-4 says “Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind let each of you regard one another as more important than himself; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others.”

My initial reaction was not regarding his needs as more important than mine. The Bible is full of verses reminding us to serve others and love our neighbor (Galatians 5:13-14, Acts 20:35, Mark 10:44-45, Mark 9:35, and many more). On one hand, I was glad that I did put my selfish desires aside and went to help him, but is it enough to just do what is right. How we do what we do can make a huge difference also. Our body language, expression, and attitude often speak much louder than the words coming out of out mouth.

WWJD (What Would Jesus Do) can be a difficult phrase to remember when faced with a choice to make. An even harder thing to consider, but one that can make even more difference would be HWJDI (How Would Jesus Do It). God is still on the throne, and as judge supreme, he will one day judge us on actions and motives. Did Jesus do what was right by serving others yet making sure they knew that he was inconvenienced by it? Of course not, he served and loved others more than himself. He has set the example for us to follow. We are to let God’s love shine through us in everything we do.

Today’s events combined with yesterday’s conversation gave me the reminder of this that I needed. Many unbelievers think Christians are people who go to Church on Sunday then don’t do anything different the rest of the week. It is true that we are all sinners (Romans 3:23, Romans 6:23). We all need to be careful of the image we are portraying to the rest of the world.

Love your neighbor as yourself. Serve Him by serving other (Matthew 25:40)

May the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ,
and the love of God,
and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit
be with us all,
now and evermore.
Amen.

What are you Seeking?

Fri, 19 Oct 2012 08:19:00 -0500

In this busy society, it is easy to get overwhelmed and preoccupied with all of the things you have to do. I often find myself being consumed with the thought “how am I going to…”, “when will I have time…”, or “I have to figure out a way to…”. Life is hectic; there is no doubt about it. We are blessed with God’s word which includes many passages to reassure us and give us hope. Even the title verse of this blog shows us that God will give us the strength to do what we need to do, if we put our trust in Him. (Isaiah 40:31)

Matthew 6:33 tells us “But seek first the kingdom of Godand His righteousness, and all these things will be provided for you.” Seek first, not after when have formulated our plan, not when everything else has failed and we are out of options, seek first the kingdom of God. Everything we are, and everything we have, is a blessing from God. He created us, provides for us, protects us, and so much more. Why is it so hard for us to completely trust Him and seek His kingdom in everything we do?

While reading and researching this topic, I found another article discussing the same verse. The recommendation given was to seek God’s kingdom by praying to Him for everything we need. Prayer is important and God does want us to pray to Him about everything. However I believe this should be taken further. Earlier in the 6^th chapter of Matthew, we are given other commands; “Be careful not to practice your righteousness in front of people, to be seen by them.” Matthew 6:1. “Whenever you pray, you must not be like the hypocrites, because they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by people.” Matthew 6:5. “Don’t collect for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal.” Matthew 6:19.

As you can see, there is much more to seeking God’s kingdom then just doing what you want and praying about it. In the book of Matthew and many other places in the Bible, we are instructed to put God first in everything. Do not spend your time seeking fame, popularity, or physical possessions. God has blessed all of us with so much more then we deserve and all he wants is for us to love, trust, honor, and follow him.

Most men will tell you they will do anything for their family. Parents work extra hard to provide things for their children. Good friends will come lend a hand on a project. But what difference will these things make if we don’t have a relationship with the Lord and have committed our life to Him so that we can receive our gift of eternal life.

“But collect for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys, and where thieves don’t break in and steal.For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” – Matthew 6:20-21

Be Wise With Your Words

Wed, 22 Aug 2012 11:44:00 -0500

King Solomon was one of the wisest men to ever walk the earth because he asked God for wisdom not material wealth. Through the knowledge that God bestowed on him he was able to gain things such as riches and power. In his meditations he discovered that the tongue holds incredible power over shaping your life, he elaborates here saying:

“From the fruit of their lips people are filled with good things, and the work of their hands brings them reward.” –Proverbs 12:14

We too must realize the power of our words over our own lives and that we have the power to control how we use them. We must pay special attention to this when we are angry or frustrated because that is when our flesh takes over and we begin to say things that are less than positive that may degrade someone else. Do your best to discipline yourself to recognize when you are feeling that way and take a moment to center yourself and be wise with your words.

Many successful and joyful people have mastered the ability to speak positive things over their lives even during times of struggle or trial. They know the calling God has on their lives and have the faith not to let anything come in the way of the destiny He has lain out for them. Those who speak wisely reap a good harvest from their words just as farmers enjoy the harvest of their crops. If you use your words to speak life and love into the lives of those around you you will have a heightened sense of purpose and fulfillment. Every conversation you have with someone else is an opportunity to build them up or tear them down, remember that when you are choosing your next sentence.

If you are struggling with speaking good things over your life or find yourself less than encouraging when talking with others the best thing you can do is bring it to God. Continue to pray that he gives you the words to speak and to help break negativity off of you. After all James 1:5 states:

“If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. “

The most important piece of information I can give you to take away is to be intentional about being wise with your words and continue to work at it. You will be surprised at the fruits you will start to bear.

- This is a guest post by Craig Desmarais. http://CraigDesmarais.com

Twitter: @CraigDesmarais Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/CraigJDesmarais

Be Wise With Your Words

No More Business as Usual

Tue, 07 Aug 2012 10:29:00 -0500

Are we just doing the ‘usual’? Do we feel better about ourselves when we help the Church with its ‘usual’ programs? Many of our communities are going downhill and turning away from Christian values in alarming numbers. If we are not satisfied with this (which we really shouldn’t be!) then the ‘usual’ obviously isn’t working!

I just read a blog post by North American Mission Board (NAMB) president Kevin Ezell that is also titled “No More Business as Usual”. The article talks about a Church planter’s conference that was expected to attract about 800 attendees. 2,200 registered! This is great news that so many are willing to do more to the kingdom of God! But, will these 2,200 individuals be able to change the world on their own? Sure it’s a great start, but it’s time for all of us to get out of our comfort zone, put aside our own hobbies, and truly Serve the Lord and do his work.

In the book of Matthew, Jesus gives us the Great Commission when he said;

“Then Jesus came to them and said, 'All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” Matthew 28:18-20 NIV

Jesus did not say “All of the Pastors need to…” or “Deacons and Elders should….” Or even “It would be nice if you…”. He said Go, and he means all of us! It is easy to convince yourself that you don’t know how, you don’t know enough, or you’re not good at it. I know I have convinced myself of that many times. The answer to this is found in Acts 1:8

“But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.” Acts 1:8 NIV

We don’t have to know what to say or how to do it. Jesus wants us to be willing to do His work and rely in Him. His Holy Spirit will empower us and give us the words to say. It is our duty to be willing to do His work to spread the Good News to Jerusalem (your city), Judea (your state), Samaria (your country), and to the ends of the earth (World)!

Be Real Men

Sat, 04 Aug 2012 08:44:00 -0500

Be Real Men

What does it mean to be a real man? In order to be a real man, do you have to drive a big truck, wear camouflaged clothes, bring home the most money, or know all of the stats for the local sports team? There is definitely nothing wrong with any of these, but does this really make us men? Did moving into that big new house or buying that new shinny car make you feel more accomplished as a man to be able to provide those things for your family? Sure it will, but does this make us men?

God calls for all women to submit to their husbands. Many men have heard this and will take up their role as head of the household. The problem is what they do with this position. Being the head of the household does not simply mean to do as you want and no one in your family is to argue with you. Men as the head of their household are called to a greater service and hold greater responsibility. (Ephesians 5:24-33) Men are called to lead and love their family, as Christ loved the Church.

Here are some facts I found to be quite startling:

95% of Church men say they don’t have male friends

According to New Man Magazine, “The typical US married couple only spends four minutes per day in ‘meaningful conversation’ with each other.”

On average, men spend one hour a year reading the Bible

The typical US congregation draws an adult crowd that’s 61% female and 39% male. This gender gap shows up in all age categories.

At least 70% of Christian men and 20% of women struggle with internet pornography.

1 Timothy 5:8 says “But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.” When Timothy is warning us about not providing for our family, he is not talking about providing a flashy house, car, and toys. As men we must provide a Godly example to our wife and family. More importantly, we must train and encourage our family to live their life for Christ. Otherwise, we are worse than an unbeliever! If you have not already, also read our post titles Be Strong & Courageous.

Are you actively leading your family to strengthen their relationship with Christ? Are you sitting on the sideline and watching her lead and teach your children? Or are you investing in their future by setting the example and strengthening them to live a life of Godly service? Let us all stand up and Be Real Men!

FamilyLife© has a program out for men and are planning a special one day event all across the country on "Super Saturday" (the day before Superbowl Sunday). Their program, Men Stepping Up, is designed to train men to tackle a challenge even bigger then the Super Bowl: the battle for godly, courageous living in their own lives. I encourage all of you to take a look at their program and either find a Church that is hosting their program, or even step up to the plate and bring it to your Church!

Are you willing to step up to the plate and be a real man for your family? Don't get caught up in what society feels is important. Be real men!

Image: FreeDigitalPhotos.net

People change, but marriage can still last a lifetime

Fri, 22 Jun 2012 20:36:00 -0500

I recently heard a story about a family friend. She married right out of college, thought she had a great life in the making, but then the real world hit. She felt that her and her husband had grown apart. She convinced herself that divorce was the only solution. She finally got the courage to call and tell him that she was leaving. His reaction, “ok, you can have the house, I’m keeping my car, we will divide everything else up later”. No argument, not fighting for what he has, just taking the easy way out. This same story plays out way too often in America. Somehow, people have convinced themselves that marriages are disposable and to just end it if things get hard.

I have heard all kinds of reasons (excuses) for divorce and most of them center around one or both individuals ‘changing’. The fact is; people do change, circumstances change, life changes, but your marriage can change and grow too. My wife and I have been married for almost 12 years. It has been really, it has been really bad. We have loved, we have fought, and we have been through counseling. We both have said and done things that hurt each other. Despite all of this, 12 years later, we love each other more today than we ever have.

Ephesians 5:25 tells us “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her” (HCSB). Love you wife as Christ loved the church. Those are some very powerful words. Christ lived his life and died for the Church (and all of us). Are we living our lives with our spouse, or are we living our life for our spouse? It is so easy to sit and think about someone else’s flaws. “If only he would….”, “I can’t stand it when she….”, but how much time do we spend considering our own actions and motives? It is very easy to get set in our daily routine, loose the newlywed excitement, and get comfortably in our relationship. However this is not excuse to let your love and devotion to your spouse slip.

A great marriage requires work and dedication. Love and happiness doesn’t happen by chance, but with some work, you can build your marriage into something that can survive even the toughest challenges life can throw at you! “..‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” Matthew 19:5-6(NIV). “Until Death do us part”. We all said it standing at the altar, saying our vows before God. Remember what you vowed. Remember that God is with you both. If you keep him in the center of your marriage, trust in Him, and truly love your spouse like Christ loved the Church, you too can have a Fireproof marriage that will last a lifetime!

Be Strong and Courageous

Mon, 12 Mar 2012 18:23:00 -0500

A phrase repeated many time in the Bible. Two simple words, with simple meanings:

Strong – of great moral power, firmness, or courage

Courageous – not deterred by danger or pain; brave

Now let’s take a look at what it really means to be Strong and Courageous. One of the best examples of this in the Bible is certainly the story of Joshua. Joshua spent many years helping Moses in the wilderness after the Exodus form Egypt. Moses was told by God that it was his time to die, and that Joshua would take his place to lead the Israelites through the Jordan River and to the land they were promised. Although Joshua had already spent many years helping Moses, there is a huge difference between helping the leader, and being the leader. This certainly takes an extra measure of courage to step up to the plate. God repeated the phrase “Be strong and courageous” many times to Joshua. God went on to tell him:

"No one will be able to stand against you as long as you live. I will be with you, just as I was with Moses. I will not leave you or forsake you.” - Joshua 1:5

I’m sure this was very comforting to Joshua, and should be comforting to us. God’s statement here does not only apply to Joshua. It also applies to us, IF we are willing to stand up, depart from our former sinful ways, and be a courageous leader for God.

If your anything like me, it is very easy to justify your own actions and think you’re doing things right. You may be thinking “well I am in a position of leadership at (work|church|home|baseball team|etc) and I do a good job, so I guess I’m already a courageous leader.” Cool, done, moving on. Hold on just a minute! Do you measure your success by the opinions of your peers, or the opinion of God? Are you putting others first and truly serving them, or just leading them for your own agenda? We all need to take the time to prayerfully examine out motives behind what we are doing. Being a strong and courageous leader doesn’t mean being a strong boss. It means you are of great moral power and brave enough to server others, while leading them on the path of what is right, not just what is popular.

The best example of this is a movie produced by Sherwood Pictures in 2011. It is a movie simply titled Courageous – Honor begins at home. If you have not seen it, I strongly recommend it. If you have a spouse, children, friends, or anyone else who looks up to you, you owe it to them to ask yourself, “Am I being a good father or just a good enough father”. I am no longer content with being a good enough father. My family deserves a strong and courageous leader of their family. A leader with great moral power who will keep their actions honorable and answerable to God. A leader who is brave enough to do what is right and unafraid of ridicule. This leader will be me. Will you be a Strong and Courageous leader for those around you?